Famous XXX statements
- When I was born, I was given a choice - A big dick or a good memory. I don't remember what I chose.
- Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory..
- A wife is a sex object. Every time you ask for sex, she objects.
- Impotence: Nature's way of saying 'No hard feelings.'
- There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men -
'don't' and 'stop', unless they are used together. - Panties: Not the best thing on earth, but next to the best thing on earth.
- There are three stages of sex in a man's life:
Tri Weekly, Try Weekly, and Try Weakly!! - Virginity can be cured.
- Virginity is not dignity, its lack of opportunity.
- Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
- I tried phone sex once but the holes in the dialer were too small.
- Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy.
- Q: What's an Australian kiss?
A: The same thing as a French kiss, only down under. - A couple just married were happy with the whole thing. He was happy with the Hole and she was happy with the Thing.
- Q: What are the three biggest tragedies in a mans life?
Life sucks, job sucks and the wife doesn't. - Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
A: Breasts don't have eyes. - Despite the old saying, 'Don't take your troubles to bed', many men still sleep with their wives!!
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